Life Coaching and Accountability

Written on August 28, 2010 at 8:52 pm, by Sandy Walden

Once again I have to say how incredibly grateful I am to my clients, they’re simply the best.

A few months ago I realized that each and every one of my holistic life coaching clients was an athlete to one degree or another. Hmmm, the odds of that seemed a bit extreme but there you have. At the same time I had been becoming more and more aware that I was not nearly as physically fit as I had been in the past. This my friends is called a clue!

One day I received an email from a friend of mine telling me about a great deal on a physical fitness boot camp being offered. Uh oh, another hint from the Universe. I decided that maybe I ought to pay attention so I signed up for the boot camp.

The truth is that I really do not like to exercise in a gym.  I walk a lot with my good boxer Indy but I was not looking forward to this boot camp. Oh, did I mention that the starting time for boot camp is 5:30 am and that it is 30 miles away from my home. This means getting up at 4 am to go and do something that I have told myself for the longest time that I truly dislike.

Maybe this needed a bit more thought; after all I had only invested $40. so backing out wouldn’t crush me financially. However, I knew I would be deeply disappointed in myself if I did back out. So, once again thinking about the fact that all of my life coaching clients were athletes, I decided to share my trepidation with them. That’s just what I did. I contacted each and every one of those amazingly fit coaching clients and told them that they were part of the inspiration that drove me to this desperate act. I also asked each life coaching client if they would care to turn the tables, would they hold me accountable for my intentions as I held them accountable for the plans they made during their coaching sessions.

The response didn’t surprise me at all, but it did thoroughly warm my heart. Each and every one of my amazing coaching clients enthusiastically agreed to hold me feet to the fire. Okay, they were kinder than that, but I needed to know that I was going to be asked about this process and how I was handling it.

This accountability has been incredibly important to me. One particular morning I awoke earlier than normal, around 3 am. Polished off a pot of coffee, did a bit of work and got very comfy in my chair. It was rainy outside and generally yucky. It most definitely felt like a good morning to spend curled up in my chair, drink more coffee and read a book until it was time for my first client meeting. And then I thought about those holistic life coaching clients of mine, I knew they would ask about boot camp. I knew I would not be judged for deciding to stay at home, but I also know that I would be supported and cheered if I actually tied up my sneakers and did the work. Needless to say, that accountability did its job. I have great attendance and know I’ll finish the program. In fact, I’ve signed up for another boot camp when this one is completed. My clients are already helping me to set new goals.

That’s very much how the  holistic life coaching process works when clients come to me. Thoughts are expanded upon, fears are examined and aspirations are encouraged. Accountability is very important. I always encourage my clients to take steps that they plan and ask them about their results. There is no brow beating if they have not completed their intended course, instead we take a look at the decision making process and the client determines if it’s time for another attempt or if an alternate route is preferred. Knowing that I am going to ask, prompts many a coaching client to take a step outside of their comfort zone. That is how progress is made.

Thanking my Higher Power for the clues and my clients for holding me accountable, I will keep at this process to regain strength and flexibility. For the record, the Divine clearly has a sense of humor. In the time since I made the commitment to this boot camp, not one of my new holistic life coaching clients is an athlete. I guess the message has been received and it’s okay to move on. Makes me smile.

I encourage you to share your intentions, goals and aspirations with someone you trust. If you give them permission to support and encourage you, you will likely find progress much easier. Accountability is a wonderful thing.

Namaste,                                                                                                                                                                                                                     Sandy

Relax and Recharge Retreat

Written on August 25, 2010 at 8:07 pm, by Sandy Walden

It’s all about you!

Join us for a weekend dedicated to giving you time to relax, rejuvenate and reconnect with your soul.

Your hosts Sandy Walden, Holistic Life Coach and Reiki Master, Teacher along with Melissa Heisler Personal and Business Coach are dedicated to providing you with group activities as well as one on one time.

This retreat is intended to encourage you to put yourself first as you rest, relax and rejuvenate. You may participate in meditation or yoga, create your personal vision board, enjoy a stress-relieving Reiki session, and release old patterns with PSYCH-K, journal, read, take walks or simply nap. All while sharing the company of other strong, nurturing women.

While there are many activities offered there is no fixed schedule as flexibility and serving your needs is top priority. No rules, simply opportunities.

Healthy meals and snacks will be provided.

Gathering time – Friday, October 15 @ 12 noon
Departure time – Sunday, October 17 @ 3pm

Location – Galena, IL
Cost – $300.00

For more information regarding the retreat, please contact Sandy at (414) 378.8764 or Serenity@SandyWalden.com.

Meditation Musings – Mindfulness

Written on August 21, 2010 at 1:54 am, by Jim Barrett

Mindfulness has been defined by the psychologist and meditation teacher Jon Kabat-Zinn as “paying attention in a particular way: on purpose, in the present moment, and non-judgmental”. Mindfulness is also a meditation technique in which one allows thoughts, images, feelings, and body sensations to pass through the mind without reacting to or becoming involved with, those things.

If, while meditating, one notices an itch on the end of the nose or in the middle of the back the meditator recognizes the sensation and allows it to pass. Simply, “I have an itch”. No attachment, no internal discussion, just “I have an itch”. Most of the time, after acknowledgment, the itch fades away and your mind has already moved on. We use the gentle, persistent returning to the Now to dismiss these sensations from our mind.

If you are a regular meditator and particular thoughts or sensations keep arising during your sitting you will take note of them, return to the moment and ponder them at a later time. Quite often simply becoming aware of the recurring thoughts or images can provide a very clear picture of what’s causing us to lose our center and/or grounding.

Please note the particulars of the definition cited above: on purpose, in the present moment, and without judgment.

We practice mindfulness on purpose. We decide it is a useful aspect of meditation, we become sensitive to it and it becomes part of our life. When we practice mindfulness in the zendo and with our sangha it’s very hard not to take it out into our daily lives.

We practice mindfulness in the present moment, in the Now. The Now is the place most meditation starts but when moved into our daily world mindfulness in the Now provides us with the real context of the events and emotions we experience, not the context we impose upon them.

We practice mindfulness without judgment. We accept what is, simply because it is. As the author R.A. Heinlein once wrote, “the observed phenomena requires no explanation, it simply exists”. Observing without judgment keeps us from jumping to conclusions. How many times have we made hasty assumptions about a situation or person and later discovered that if we had just kept ourselves open and nonjudgmental we would been saved a great deal of embarrassment? This same concept dispels the “why me?” and “it’s not fair” kind of thinking. Whatever it is, it just is.

Mindfulness can be used to help us relieve stress and anxiety simply by allowing it to pull us back into the Now. Stopping the whirling thoughts helps us move to a more stable mental place. When our technological world starts to overwhelm us a return to the Now of nature can reset our physical and mental clocks from the frantic pace of today’s techno-environment to the unique tempo nature imposes upon herself. We must never forget that it’s also our natural tempo and anything else is artificial.

Personally, I think I’ll go outside and mindfully feel the breeze on my face, smell the flowers in the garden and enjoy the Now.

Namaste
Jim

Reiki Healing Circles in New Berlin, WI

Written on August 14, 2010 at 1:55 am, by Sandy Walden

Recently we all have spent quite a lot of time hearing about and watching events unfold regarding the oil spill in the gulf.  It’s always gets our attention when something of that sort happens. While it was gut wrenching to watch the news about it every day, I believe these things always happen for a reason.

About this time I started to hear people ask for Reiki to be sent to heal the planet, others asked to pray for animals, still others offered this intention during meditation.  It quickly became clear to me that the reason I was hearing this again and again within a very short time frame was so that I would be prompted to do my part.

What does that look like? Well, I’m very excited to share with you that I have begun Reiki Healing Circles at Serenity, located in New Berlin, WI. Twice a month from 6:30 to 7:30 pm. On the second Monday of the month, this gathering is held for the intention of healing the planet and all non-human life. Of course this includes our oceans, mountains, trees, birds, animals, etc.

On the fourth Monday of the month we meet at the same time for the intention of healing all human life.  Those who gather are welcome to offer specific intentions for those they love, whether or not those loved ones are in attendance.

These gatherings are called Reiki Healing Circles, because I am a Reiki Master, Teacher and during these gatherings I offer Reiki as do some of the other participants. However, I would like to welcome anyone of good intentions to join us, offering Reiki, prayer, loving thoughts, whatever feels right to them. While I am happy to welcome anyone who is able to join us in person, please know that you are welcome to participate from where ever you are. Your loving intentions are all that is necessary.

I encourage you to spread the word, begin your own Reiki Healing Circles, prayer groups or spend time in gathering to simply share your intentions in any way that feels right to you. Together I absolutely believe we will make a difference to the health of the amazing planet we live on and those we are honored to live alongside.

Namaste,                                                                                                                                                                                                                      Sandy

Meditation Musings – Equanimity

Written on August 8, 2010 at 5:32 am, by Jim Barrett

A natural process in meditation for many people is the development of equanimity- the ability to “let go”. Equanimity allows us to detach ourselves from thoughts and images that attempt to distract us from the Now. As we sit and meditate our minds may become distracted by things like “What will I have for lunch?” or “I should be doing……” or “Why did I …..” Equanimity allows us to gently and persistently bring ourselves back to the moment. No guilt, no sense of failure, no idea of “I must try harder”. Just a gentle and persistent return to the Now.

When this feeling carries over into the rest of our world we begin applying equanimity to our daily life. We typically lose much of the “why me?” and “it isn’t fair” kind of thinking. We might spend more time in the Now, truly interacting with the people around us and seeing our environment in a mindful and sensitive way.

Equanimity and the return to the Now can help when our minds start to work in circles, become unduly anxious about something in the future or past, or obsess on a given thought or phrase. It also allows us to release negative thoughts and emotions about our daily aggravations and irritations. That petty squabble with a spouse or coworker never gets a chance to be over-thought or blown out of proportion if our equanimity allows us to release the conflict and return to a more centered and grounded mental state. The same process allows many people to release the persistent thoughts that keep them awake at night, as their minds refuse to let go of their waking activities.

Other people sometimes misinterpret our equanimity as a “don’t care” attitude. Actually, we wouldn’t have to apply our ability to release things if we didn’t care. A better interpretation would be “I care but it wouldn’t be productive for me to hang on to this thought, feeling, image, or emotion”.

For me, equanimity is the source of that small smile I often wear. It’s not amusement at the foibles and foolishness of the people around me, it’s the result of recognizing my own silliness at becoming entangled in the snares my mind creates out of unnecessary attachments to things that won’t do me any good. I release them and smile at the human nature that causes even those of us who know better to be caught up in such futile exercises.

Meditation has many benefits for the practitioner and the development of equanimity is only one of them. The ability to release nonproductive or unnecessary attachments in our mind helps bring out that sense of peace and serenity that should be a mainstay of our daily lives.

Namaste,
Jim

Will Reiki Cure Me?

Written on July 31, 2010 at 4:39 pm, by Sandy Walden

Maybe, maybe not.

I bet you wanted more than that didn’t you? Here’s the full scoop, I simply cannot say and neither can anyone else. When I offer Reiki to someone it’s with the intention that the Reiki do for that person what is for their highest good. I simply cannot predict nor judge what that will look like.

Reiki is by definition life-force energy. Our personal energy becomes disrupted by negativity or imbalance of any sort. Thoughts, emotions, physical distress, all can knock our energy out of balance and may manifest as ailments on any level, physical, mental, emotional or spiritual. When you receive Reiki the energy flows to offer you balance once again. However, how and when you receive that energy is up to you on both a conscious and subconscious level.

When I offer Reiki to a client I ask them to intend that the energy will help them to release the negativity which no longer serves their highest good. It is important however to note that I have no way of knowing what the receiver is ready to release. If we are ready on all levels to heal then the healing may well begin. That healing may begin on a spiritual level and offer physical relief, either partial or complete. The balance that is restored to a client begins the healing on whatever level is for their highest good at that moment.

Healing has many definitions. It may the complete resolution of a problem, or it may be temporary relief of certain symptoms. For instance, I occasionally suffer from shoulder pain. While I may ask for relief from this pain during a Reiki session, until and unless I am ready to release the mental and emotional issues which manifest themselves as that pain, it will recur in time.

Am I asking for temporary relief or long term healing? Am I willing to make the changes to my life which will bring about healing? These changes may mean respecting and loving myself enough to take excellent self-care. It could be forgiving someone who has hurt me, releasing old grievances, reducing work or family stress, etc.

When my dog Indy had his strokes, I found myself offering him Reiki to heal him on whatever level was appropriate for him. I had no way of knowing if this meant restoration to his former strong, athletic self or minimizing his discomfort and bringing him peace as he passed form this life. All I knew for sure was that the Reiki would calm Indy, and do what was truly best for him.

What all of this means is that I can and will make absolutely no promises about what your Reiki experience will look or feel like. I assure you that Reiki can never do harm, only good. While some clients report dramatic healing experiences that is not the case for everyone. Reiki will offer you restored balance and as we return to the balance which nature intended we are restored to our personal best.

I encourage you to give me a call for your own Reiki session. Then you will have the opportunity to explain to me just how the experienced has offered benefit to you.

Namaste,

Sandy

Meditation Musings – Being In The Now

Written on July 24, 2010 at 4:29 am, by Jim Barrett

Meditation comes in many forms and with many techniques but one of the commonalities of most of them is that one must usually start by being in the Now.

Among the traditional Ways, most fall into one of two methods; concentrative or mindful. In concentrative meditation one focuses their attention on something specific, the breathing, an image, or a sound (mantra), while in mindful meditation one allows thoughts, images, feelings, sensory input, to pass through the mind without attaching to them or becoming engaged by them. In either technique one must have a starting point and that point is usually the Now.

Most of us don’t spend much time in the Now. Have you ever finished a routine trip in the car without being aware of the actual trip? You were somewhere but you weren’t in the Now. Your mind was thinking about something else while your body was on “auto-pilot”. When you are lying awake for the second night in a row, unable to sleep because your thoughts keep whirling around in your head, you’re not in the Now. When you walk away from the stove without turning off the burner, you’re dangerously not in the Now. For much of human history not being in the Now was often a fatal condition.

Babies exist in the Now and one can often watch as toddlers stop living in the Now over a matter of weeks or months. If you’ve ever played an intense game of volleyball (or some other sport) and felt like you had all the time in the world as everything around you slowed down, you were in the Now. The runner who’s in “the zone” and exhilarates in the feeling of the breath in their nostrils and the blood pumping in their arteries is in the Now.

Meditation allows us to relearn being in the Now and many of us then carry that process out of the zendo and into our daily lives. When one has learned to use that gentle, persistent redirection of the mind into the Now while meditating one often finds applications in other places. When faced with a complicated or tedious task at work, being in the Now allows us to keep focus and make better use of our time and energy. When interacting with other people, being in the Now makes us more tuned-in to them and can make us aware of subtle verbal and nonverbal cues we would otherwise miss. If one is in the Now at bedtime those whirling thoughts aren’t there and one can finally get to sleep. In a strange or unfamiliar situation being in the Now can bring to our attention details and information that can help keep us safe.

Some schools of meditation indicate that the ultimate goal of sitting is to move into a state where one is always in the Now. I would like to meet such a person. I marvel at the thought of such a disciplined mind and I think it would be fascinating to see how they deal with their day-to-day world.

Personally, this is one of the reasons that I say I “practice” meditation, staying in the Now isn’t always easy for me. I have, however, learned to notice the signs of my distraction and gently and persistently pull myself back into the moment. As time goes by I’ll continue to get better at it. It’s another tool in my spiritual and mental toolbox that helps enhance my life and make me a better person.

Namaste,
Jim

Join Team Ameriprise/Serenity!

Written on July 19, 2010 at 12:44 pm, by Sandy Walden

I don’t know anyone whose life has not been touched by cancer in one form or another. Ovarian cancer is often referred to as ‘The Disease that Whispers’ because it is often undetected in early stages. WOCA, or Wisconsin Ovarian Cancer Alliance is working hard to change all of that. It is their mission to educate the public regarding the symptoms of ovarian cancer so that it is recognized in it’s earliest stages when the survival rate is extremely high. They also make it their mission to offer support and advocate on behalf of women with ovarian cancer. These ladies are hard working, but always cheerful and optimistic. They know they are making a real difference in the world.

September is ovarian cancer awareness month. WOCA holds many events during September and one of them is Nancy’s Run, Rock N Stroll on September 18th. One of my favorite people suggested forming ‘Team Serenity’, a few team members will undoubtedly run the 5K and some will walk. This is your invitation to participate as part of Team Serenity.

You are of course most welcome to participate on your own or form your own team! For more information, visit the WOCA website. http://www.wisconsinovariancancer.com/news-and-events.php The brochure is also attached.

There are many other wonderful events happening, particularly in September, including the month long event ‘Turn the Towns Teal’ when they ask us to simply raise awareness of ovarian cancer by tying teal ribbons (gladly provided by WOCA) on your mailbox, lamp posts or at your place of business.

Serenity is donating $10 from each coaching and Reiki appointment scheduled in September to WOCA, it is our privilege to support this wonderful organization.

Give me a jingle, or drop me a line via email if you’d like to join Team Serenity. Of course we’ll have a great time and we will be making a difference. How cool is that?

Namaste,
Sandy

Meditation Musings

Written on July 15, 2010 at 3:59 pm, by Jim Barrett

As Serenity expands it’s Group Meditation offerings I’d like to take a few
moments to talk about how we view meditation and how our groups tend to work.

Modern science tells us of many benefits of meditation including lower blood
pressure, stress level reduction and better sleep patterns. Most of us who
practice meditation would add to the list, a better understanding of ourselves
and a generally calmer attitude towards life’s travails and petty indignations.
Some form of meditation seems to be a part of most civilizations and some
methods have been in use for thousands of years.

I was an occasional meditator for many years and mostly practiced when I felt
the stress in my life becoming overwhelming. One day it dawned on me that if
meditation could help when I was under a heavy stress load, perhaps, if used on
a regular basis, it could keep my stress load from building up in the first
place.
As I practiced on a more regular basis I began to study the different types of
meditation disciplines. I was struck, not by the differences, but by the
similarities. I also found that my own meditation technique (crafted  by 40
years of intermittent practice) fell into none of the traditional methods. And
yet, I benefit enormously from my practice.

I don’t find it surprising that humans have found such diverse ways to touch
that place we touch when we meditate. We are an endlessly creative species. And
the similarities within all these practices? Well, how many shapes can a wheel
be? They were all created to get us to that place we go when we  sit. That is
their greatest commonality.

My friend Sandy says that when she prays she’s talking to God, when she
meditates she’s listening to God. I start my meditation each morning with the
affirmation “I sit, I sit because it is what I do, I sit without thought of goal
or gain”. Our respect for each other’s Way is evident and when you come to our
group your Way will be equally respected.

If you’ve never meditated before we can certainly help you find your own Way.
There’s nothing magical or difficult about it. You don’t have to sit
cross-legged on a funny cushion (but please don’t mind if I do). You don’t have
to “stop your thoughts” (unless you want to). If you do nothing but sit quietly
in a calm and supportive atmosphere you will begin to reap the benefits of
meditation.

Our groups usually meet for 90 minutes. First we typically have a short reading
and/or discussion about some aspect of meditation. We then have 30-45 minutes of
meditation, which could be a guided meditation recording, meditation appropriate
music, or guidance by a group member. We then have a short time to unwind,
discuss the day’s meditation, journal or sit quietly. Whatever the group
prefers.

We presently have our Wednesday morning group which meets from 9:30-11:00 am but
if you would like to see a group at another time or in another format, let us
know. We will be expanding to evenings and weekends as new groups form. We have
a $5 fee per session to help defray the cost of the space, tea, and water.

As these groups grow I’m excited about meeting people with techniques new to me
and those who wish to begin meditating for the first time. Who knows what we’ll
learn?

Nemaste,
Jim

What do You Prefer?

Written on June 27, 2010 at 10:36 am, by Sandy Walden

I believe that we live the life that we ask for. We ask with our thoughts, so be careful what you think.

It seems to me that more and more people are becoming aware, or being reawakened to what I believe is an absolute fact, the universe operates on the law of attraction. What does this law say? Very simply, that our thoughts are magnetic attractors which draw to us the life that we are living. Our thoughts form our beliefs and our beliefs become our reality.

Huh? If that’s your response, bear with me here and we’ll explore this a bit more. Have you ever been worried about something in your life and given yourself a headache? Who do you think created that headache? Have you had the experience of driving to an appointment telling yourself the entire time that ‘I just know I’m going to be late!’ and then arrived late? Why do you think that you lived out your thoughts, fate?  We’ve all heard about medical studies, group A is given a medication, group B is given a sugar pill or some sort of neutral ‘medication’, but still group B achieves some excellent response? Ah, yes, the placebo effect.

We’ve got excellent reasons for each of the results above, and we usually say things like ‘of course I’ve got a headache, I’m upset’ or ‘placebo effect means it’s not real, it’s all in your head’. Hmmm, it seems to me that if I believe that being upset results in a headache then doesn’t that mean that my mental or emotional state has brought about my current  physical reality? Let’s go further with the placebo effect, there are many research papers written verifying that the placebo effect, means that results are achieved. Love that! Follow this link for a very powerful article on the placebo effect. http://bit.ly/NR69

This is the premise that we begin with when we gather for the MasterMind groups. Here’s the skinny on how it all works. We gather in a group of no more than five (5) people so that there is time for each participant to share effectively. We spend a short time sharing what is going on in our lives and then we quickly move to sharing the way we would prefer our lives to unfold. Here’s where the power comes in…are you ready? We have already affirmed our belief that we can create our lives with our beliefs, we believe that when we combine our intentions, agreeing to see specific results for one another and asking our Higher Power to bring this about that we are amplifying the intention and bringing it faster, stronger and more clearly than if any of us were working individually. All of the participants in the group agree to see or visualize the life that each of the other participants prefers. In other words, if Herb asks me to see him driving an orange VW convertible, I take the time each day to ‘see’ him driving that orange VW convertible, knowing that his preferences are coming to him now.  We always acknowledge and appreciate with sincere gratitude the successes which have come about in each of our lives. We hold onto that knowledge and appreciation when holding our intentions for one another. It’s very powerful.

The upshot of all of this? We are now leading our lives much more intentionally. The awareness that we create our lives with our thoughts and beliefs is an eye-opening and very exciting experience. It encourages us to be mindful of our thoughts, the words we speak and the state of mind that we maintain. If I would like my life to be rosey in all aspects,  I simply intend that  everything I experience will be rosey.  Awesome!

This week I encourage you to get clear about how you would like your life to unfold. As for me, I intend and expect  that everything is coming up roses.

Namaste,

Sandy