Posts Tagged ‘Attitude’

Fear

Saturday, March 31st, 2012

Fear seems to be the topic of many conversations lately. So, I wanted to share a few thoughts with you. Feel free to weigh in here with your own thoughts and feelings, you have great wisdom; please share.

In the past few months I have been pondering my place at various gatherings. I was feeling mightily intimidated! Although the truth is that it took me a few months to realize that is what I was truly feeling. Yep, the life coach can be very resistant about recognizing her own stuff.

Now let me be very, very clear about this; my feelings of intimidation had nothing to do with anything that anyone else at these gatherings.  It was all self-generated; surprise! 🙂

I would listen to people I care about, each of whom is very dear to me and I realized that I was measuring myself against their successes. This one generates this sort of money and has a very successful history of being a financial success – that’s not me, I must be a failure. This one is steadily building her business and we all see her success growing day by day as her client base grows – that’s not me, I must be a failure. This one has released that negative person from her life – that’s not me, I must be a failure. This one has gone through this, that or whatever – that’s not me….I think you get my point.

So, after lots of hours pondering my own issues, I realized that I was intimidated. Had to think that through some more. What did that really mean to me? It meant that I was afraid. Ahhhh, there it is – fear! It’s something that all people deal with, but in many different ways.

After having a chat with one of my dearest friends on the phone about fear of success recently, I felt a though it was time to address this issue of fear. For me, and if it resonates with you, then for you as well. 🙂

While I was very busy being intimidated, I was using fear to build that up into something that felt as though I didn’t belong. This gave me the very handy, dandy excuse not to take the time to define success for myself. And if I didn’t define it, then whew, I couldn’t fail. Fear was keeping me from failing, but it was also a very convenient way to avoid measuring my own success. Is it possible that this is true for you? In any aspect of your life?

Here’s the thing, fear – which you realize is no longer in red! Is a very human emotion. Normal and completely reasonable – when it’s kept to its appropriate place. It keeps us from running into traffic and it prevents us from wanting to play with badgers in the wild. I’m pretty sure you’ll all agree that a healthy amount of fear about certain things is appropriate.

First step to dealing with fear is to acknowledge it. So, here goes.

Success – what is your definition? Not how you think any of the rest of will define success, but how do YOU define success? For you and only for you.

– How can you measure that success?

– How will your life change if you are successful?

Beware; that last one is possibly the trickiest question that I ever use in coaching. I really want to encourage you to think about all the aspects of success.

What is someone is working to become free of alcohol. If she is successful and releases alcohol from her life then she will be expected to take on more responsibilities at home, which already feels overwhelming for her. She wants to release alcohol and being free represents success to her, but there is a very strong; perhaps even compelling reason in her mind to keep drinking. She feels incapable of taking on more at home and it is quite a process for her to open herself up to the possibility that perhaps someone else can step up and take on the other responsibilities at home.

Someone else may be experiencing with poor health. While she is suffering loved ones, family and friends call and check in on her. They let her know frequently how much they care about her, she matters in their life. If she gets well, if she is successful – will they go away? There is strong reason for her to stay sick. Working to make those connections regardless of health is how she is overcoming this very real fear which has stood in the way of good health.

Are there any reasons for you to stay in a less than successful position? When you think about all that will change in your experience if you are successful – as defined by you. Please include those that feel good and those that worry you as well.

Are you ready to embrace success? If so, to what degree? How can I support you in your success?

Now I am completely open together on this process. Either privately or in a group. Ng How about you, are you open to welcoming your success?

Are you ready to face fear, face it head on, look fear in the eye and put it back in proportion to what is healthy in your life? I am and I invite you to do the same.

You deserve to be happy, and I mean silly happy! It’s my most sincere desire for you to know that as well.

Namaste,
Sandy

Just What Do You Deserve?

Saturday, January 7th, 2012

Probably the most common theme that I hear in my office, is the idea that the person is not deserving of the best life has to offer. This feeling seems to recognize no boundaries. I hear it from women as well as men. Young, middle-aged and elders. These people seem to think that they must put themselves last – always.

What some of these people think they do deserve is something less than others. A woman I know was very concerned. After all, she believed very strongly that when one is faced with an argument or conflict of some sort,  that there are two choices. Be kind or attack. As she is a very nice woman, her typical response has been to be kind to others, at her own expense.  I got the call from her when she wanted to discuss her most recent behavior. She had stood up for herself! She was direct and straight forward, realizing that she deserved to be treated with respect and appreciation. This is where we all stand and shout ‘wahoo!’.

An incredible person recently offered this thought. Is our body a vessel or host to our spirit? If you answered yes, keep going with me. If my body is host to my spirit, then my spirit is my ever-present guest. How do you treat guests in your home?  If you’re like me, you always offer guests the very best. The pretty little soaps in the bathroom. The best chair at the backyard fire. The finest cut of the entree served at dinner.

If I’m always offering the best to others, but refusing to accept quality for myself, I am treating my own guest very badly. This fascinating concept rang true for me, so I began sharing it with my clients. What I am discovering; to my absolute delight is that it rings true for others as well.

So, does this mean that I advocate being out for myself regardless of effects or ramifications to others?  Nope, not at all. It does mean that I believe in treating myself with the same sort of appreciation and respect that I offer to others. And I encourage my clients to do the same. It feels good, in fact it feels terrific!

A very nice side-effect of treating myself with the same appreciation, respect and kindness that I offer to others is that I don’t feel short changed when I do something nice for someone else. Nice bonus, huh? Think about it for a couple of seconds and I’m sure it will make complete sense to you as well.

If you are always putting others before yourself, you are being short changed. It’s completely natural and reasonable that resentment would build and that anger is likely to follow. Let’s circumvent this entire situation by simply bringing a bit of balance to the situation. That means acknowledging that you deserve to expect and receive the best that the world has to offer. I encourage you to expect that from now on.

Balance isn’t all that difficult when we practice. If need be, you may want to think of yourself as Spirit, after all that is an integral part of you. What does your guest deserve? Offer the best to your Spirit, your ever-present guest and everyone will benefit.

Namaste,

Sandy

 

 

 

 

Group Coaching

Sunday, October 23rd, 2011

Group Coaching

Have you ever heard the expression “There is great strength in numbers”? It’s true!

Here are a few benefits to group coaching:

  • As your coach, I will always help you to hold the focus on the goals which are important to you.
  • You will find support and motivation from others as you connect with others in your group.
  • You will learn, grow and be inspired as you share stories and wisdom with one another.
  • You will benefit from accountability and watch your ‘to-do’ items move to the ‘done’ column.
  • Group celebration! You celebrate your success with the people who truly care about you.
  • You grow and move forward with a professional coach at a very affordable fee.

Weekly, Thursday mornings, 7–9 am
$100 per month, that’s only $25 per coaching session!

The adventure begins Thursday, November 3rd  –  Register Now!

To register visit the website: http://www.sandywalden.com/coaching/business-coaching.php or call Sandy to reserve your spot 414-378-8764

This group is forming now, space will be limited so if you are ready to begin living the life you know you desire, register today.

Namaste,

Sandy

 

 

Life Coaching – All Together Now, Shift

Saturday, July 16th, 2011

I learned to drive in a 1970 VW Beetle with a stick-shift. It was beyond awesome! 

Anyone who has ever driven a stick-shift, or to name it more correctly, a manual transmission; knows that in order to prevent burning out the clutch, you learn to listen to the car, to feeeeeeeeeel when it is time to shift. Guess what? People come with the same sort of clues. When we work together, you as the client, me as the coachm you will be encouraged to listen to your own guidance. What do you hear? What do you feel?

As you learn to hear and feel what you really want, you will easily and quite effortlessly learn if and when it’s time to shift. Here’s the good part, it’s so much easier than learning to shift that Bug. You will hardly hear the grinding at all. 🙂

You can learn how to listen and feel the messages that are guiding you, really. As your coach, I will encourage you to listen for that special sound, feel that vibration that is your inner guidance. This will allow you to decide if it’s time to make a shift. As your coach, I will offer thoughts, ideas and suggestions. Mostly, I will encourage you to discover just how your intuition is guiding you. For instance, if you are feeling bad about a situation in your past, we might discover if you have learned anything from the incident. If you have gained something beneficial from a past incidence, that knowledge may allow you to see the past issue as something of a gift. That my friend is a shift. Some are big, some are small. They happen if you’re ready, when you’re ready and in just the way you prefer.

You might say that life coaching is all about shifts, you might be right or wrong. For you, the coaching experience may well be all about shifts, or it may be about moving forward in another manner. That’s part of the fun! The path that you take when you work with a life coach is all up to you.

This journey is yours. You call the shots. You decide if you would like to take a peek at your past and find ways to shift into a more positive frame of mind. You decide what you prefer to deal with and in what manner. Of course your coach, (yours truly) will have suggestions which you may accept. Or not. You get to decide what is discussed and what is not. How cool is that?

I’m also going to ask you to take a look at what is happening in your world right now, today, this very moment in fact. How are you looking at situations, happenings, events? It’s my job to help you discover possibilities. Pretty exciting stuff really. When you explore possibilities, you will be encouraged to listen to and feel that guidance that we talked about a few paragraphs ago. And then you will shift to a place of feeling better. If you want to, if you’re ready. Shifting to a place that allows you to see and feel new possibilities. Shifting is huge.

Alright, I admit that I sort of nut-shelled the entire life coaching experience. But if I were to nut-shell it even more, I might well say that the entire coaching experience is about shifting. Are you ready to shift?

This week, I encourage you to take a few minutes a day. Sitting quietly, allow yourself to tune into your own thoughts and feelings. What do you really want in life? What would you prefer? Then let’s talk.

Namaste,

Sandy

 

 

 

 

Energy and the Penny Wall

Saturday, November 20th, 2010

What you are looking at – if you are looking at the picture here is a Penny Wall. Well, that’s what I’m calling it anyway.

A few days ago my friend and fellow Serenity Community member, Andrea Lange asked me if I had ever stuck a penny to the wall using only my energy. While I’ve had some interesting experiences in my life I had to admit that up until then I had never thought of sticking pennies to the wall. Have you?

So, I asked her what we were using to adhere these pennies, some shiny, some dull to this wall in the hall between our offices. Her response shouldn’t have surprised me, but it did. Energy and Intention. Do you dig that or what!?

Okay, I thought I would give it a try. Picking up a penny, I pressed it against the wall as hard as I could. As soon as I removed my finger the apparently un-energized penny fell to the floor with a quiet but very distinct thud. Oh. Maybe there’s more to this than I had considered. Andrea only chuckled a little bit; she’s a very kind and gentle woman. 🙂 We chatted a bit more. Andrea’s instructions were simple, she asked me to intend that the penny easily stick to the wall. See, feel and believe that my energy was flowing through me, through the penny and into the wall. Know it would stay there if that was my intention.

On the second try, my penny stuck. I was so excited I’m sure many of you heard me shout and perhaps felt the earth shake a bit as I jumped up and down in absolute glee. To say I was absolutely delighted by the energetic penny would be something of an understatement. Andrea stuck her penny to the wall and we both went home.

The next day our pennies were still stuck to the wall. Oh, this was getting even better! So, as I saw clients during the day, I invited them to stick their pennies to the wall. Following the instructions Andrea had shared I encouraged them to use their energy, their intention to feel, see and know the pennies would adhere, easily and totally effortlessly. I should have been taking pictures of the looks in the eyes as one person after another easily placed their penny on the wall.

All of this has a point you know. It’s a visual example of what we can and do accomplish each and every day with our intentions, using our energy. We move through life, thinking one thing and another. Having expectations that are positive or perhaps less than happy. Each of these thoughts, intentions, worries, fears and expectations has an effect on our life. The Penny Wall makes that pretty clear.

I think I’m going to take some fabulous colored pencils into the office and ask clients to sign and date their pennies as they put them on the wall. Just a little reminder that our energy, our thoughts, our intentions create our world.

I’m not speaking specifically about life coaching, Reiki, meditation or any other form of energy work today. In fact I’m talking about all of these things and more. I encourage you to simply take a moment to think about how you would like your life to unfold today. What would make you happy? Allow your thoughts and feelings to flow easily, what feels good to you? Take one more look at the Penny Wall. When I tried to attach my penny using force it fell to the floor. When I gently held it to the wall and asked for it to stay, it did.

No nagging here. The coach is going for another cup of coffee and an apple. I just wanted to share my energy and intention with you. I intend to have a fabulous day; perhaps I’ll put another penny on the wall. If you would like to add yours, come on by. There are plenty for everyone.

Namaste,

Sandy

Crossing Guard, Life Coach

Saturday, October 9th, 2010

The other day I was on my way to work, a short jaunt from Milwaukee to New Berlin. For some reason I took a slightly different route than was typical for me.  I’m so glad that I did.

As I approached the middle school I noticed that the crossing guard that is usually there was in fact not there today. Instead there was a man I had never seen before. I swear this man simply exuded happiness and joy. It was in his entire being, his simple presence almost shouted in a most cheerful way ‘Happy, Joy, Fun’. Interesting. He wasn’t doing anything all that different than what many crossing guards do; it was the look on his face I think that made the difference.

This gentleman was using both arms to wave to folks driving by. Not in a frenzied, lunatic way that you might imagine as I say he was waving with both arms. Nope, he was simply sending a smile and a greeting to everyone. This man was offering his love to each and every person who happened to be lucky enough to pass him by.

As a life coach I encourage each person I work with to think thoughts that make them happy, to offer a smile even when they don’t quite feel like it. I ask my life coaching clients to make a deliberate effort to offer peace to the world through their body language, their words and their energy. This man had all of this down pat and it made my day better to simply see him.

Such a simple wonderful gift. You and I can offer this gift to others as we go through our day as well. It makes a powerful difference to the way I feel if I muster a small smile when I’m feeling glum. I feel just a tad bit better. Hmmm, that’s worth taking a step further. It turns out that offering a smile and a kind word feels even better to me and when I receive a kind word and smile from someone else I remember it for hours and hours. These are such simple, small steps. Practically no effort at all! But it feels so very good.

When I offer a smile and a kind word, I feel better and so does the person I shared with. The life coach in me says that it’s very important to keep this lovely energy going, keep spreading it around. I like to encourage my life coaching clients and even many of my Reiki clients to do a bit of homework. I ask them to make it a point to catch themselves when they want to offer a word that is less than kind, when they begin to think a negative thought or get irritated at something that is happening in their world. At that moment, I ask them to make a deliberate offering of peace and love to the situation or people involved. If they can’t quite muster love, I ask them to offer peace and calm. This homework is to continue for a full week.

When we chat about this deliberate offering of peace,  I hear how the clients became more and more aware of their thoughts. As the week went on they more easily noticed their tone of voice, how they held their body and they became very aware of the words they were speaking. This awareness led them to making deliberate choices. They began to ask themselves if offering the words they were going to say would help or hinder the situation and then spoke accordingly. My coaching clients tell me that they find themselves less stressed, feeling better and being more patient with others. Nice, very nice.

All of this is what this wonderful crossing guard does for me each time I see him. He puts me in mind of the cheerful flowers that bloom in my yard. I now find myself deliberately taking that route so that I have the opportunity to share a cheerful smile and a wave in the morning. It feels pretty darned good. This wonderful man is acting as a life coach and I very much appreciate the continuing lesson. Thank you sir.

Namaste,                                                                                                                                                                                                                     Sandy

Meditation Musing-Focusing The Mind

Saturday, September 4th, 2010

When someone recently told me that they often couldn’t sleep because their mind just kept spinning around and wouldn’t stop, I suggested that they visit one of our meditation groups. I was told sadly that meditation wouldn’t work for them because their mind wouldn’t stay in one place for that long, they couldn’t concentrate like that.

I gently tried to explain that if only the people who could concentrate and focus their minds perfectly meditated there probably wouldn’t be very many meditators. In fact, I continued, I believe one of the purposes of meditating is to help build the muscles of the mind. Meditating is, for the mind, what a workout is for the body.

Using the gentle, persistent return to the Now during meditation is the mental equivalent to lifting weights. One starts with a level and intensity with which they are comfortable and through regular exercise of their mental muscles they get better and better at telling their mind what to do and having it obey. You sit in your space and when your mind goes someplace else you gently and persistently bring it back to the Now. Over and over and over. Like a would-be runner who can only jog a few moments before becoming winded and one day finds themselves trotting along for forty five minutes or an hour, the meditator gradually learns to keep their mind in the Now for longer and longer periods. Among other things this process teaches us patience and, perhaps most importantly, it teaches us patience with ourselves, which for many people is much harder than having patience with others.

Some Ways have a practitioner focus their minds on a thing; breathing, a mantra, a candle, focusing the mind like a zoom lens. Other Ways have one focus the mind on nothing, passing thoughts and sensations through the mind with no attachment or comment, a mental wide angle lens. Whichever Way one chooses, the focus is a tool to bring us into the Now. Our ability to use a tool quickly and efficiently grows with practice. So does the ability to discipline our mind

Please understand, the purpose here is not necessarily to reformat our brains to live only or entirely in the Now, although some Ways strive for just that. Mostly we want to be able to bring ourselves to that calm and stable mental place when we need or want to. That way, when a crisis occurs or we can’t get to sleep we can take the deep abdominal breaths with which we start our meditations and we will automatically return to the Now, grounded and centered, our minds calm and serene. And yes, the same processes can help us experience pleasurable moments of our lives quite intensely. Human interactions can be quite interesting when the people involved are in the Now. What greater compliment or gift could we give to another person besides our complete, undivided, focused attention?

Namaste
Jim

Life Coaching and Accountability

Saturday, August 28th, 2010

Once again I have to say how incredibly grateful I am to my clients, they’re simply the best.

Temporary State Fair tattoo to show off my improving biceps.

A few months ago I realized that each and every one of my holistic life coaching clients was an athlete to one degree or another. Hmmm, the odds of that seemed a bit extreme but there you have it. At the same time I had been becoming more and more aware that I was not nearly as physically fit as I had been in the past. This my friends is called a clue!

One day I received an email from a friend of mine telling me about a great deal on a physical fitness boot camp being offered. Uh oh, another hint from the Universe. I decided that maybe I ought to pay attention so I signed up for the boot camp.

The truth is that I really do not like to exercise in a gym.  I walk a lot with my good boxer buddy Indy but I was not looking forward to this boot camp. Oh, did I mention that the starting time for boot camp is 5:30 am and that it is 30 miles away from my home. This means getting up at 4 am to go and do something that I have told myself for the longest time that I truly dislike.

Maybe this needed a bit more thought; after all I had only invested $40. so backing out wouldn’t crush me financially. However, I knew I would be deeply disappointed in myself if I did back out. So, once again thinking about the fact that all of my life coaching clients were athletes, I decided to share my trepidation with them. That’s just what I did. I contacted each and every one of those amazingly fit coaching clients and told them that they were part of the inspiration that drove me to this desperate act. I also asked each life coaching client if they would care to turn the tables, would they hold me accountable for my intentions as I held them accountable for the plans they made during their coaching sessions.

The response didn’t surprise me at all, but it did thoroughly warm my heart. Each and every one of my amazing coaching clients enthusiastically agreed to hold me feet to the fire. Okay, they were kinder than that, but I needed to know that I was going to be asked about this process and how I was handling it.

This accountability has been incredibly important to me. One particular morning I awoke earlier than normal, around 3 am. Polished off a pot of coffee, did a bit of work and got very comfy in my chair. It was rainy outside and generally yucky. It most definitely felt like a good morning to spend curled up in my chair, drink more coffee and read a book until it was time for my first client meeting. And then I thought about those holistic life coaching clients of mine, I knew they would ask about boot camp. I knew I would not be judged for deciding to stay at home, but I also know that I would be supported and cheered if I actually tied up my sneakers and did the work. Needless to say, that accountability did its job. I have great attendance and know I’ll finish the program. In fact, I’ve signed up for another boot camp when this one is completed. My clients are already helping me to set new goals.

That’s very much how the¬¨‚Ć holistic life coaching process works when clients come to me. Thoughts are expanded upon, fears are examined and aspirations are encouraged. Accountability is very important. I always encourage my clients to take steps that they plan and ask them about their results. There is no brow beating if they have not completed their intended course, instead we take a look at the decision making process and the client determines if it’s time for another attempt or if an alternate route is preferred. Knowing that I am going to ask, prompts many a coaching client to take a step outside of their comfort zone. That is how progress is made.

Thanking my Higher Power for the clues and my clients for holding me accountable, I will keep at this process to regain strength and flexibility. For the record, the Divine clearly has a sense of humor. In the time since I made the commitment to this boot camp, not one of my new holistic life coaching clients is an athlete. I guess the message has been received and it’s okay to move on. Makes me smile.

I encourage you to share your intentions, goals and aspirations with someone you trust. If you give them permission to support and encourage you, you will likely find progress much easier. Accountability is a wonderful thing.

Namaste,
Sandy

Meditation Musings – Being In The Now

Saturday, July 24th, 2010

Meditation comes in many forms and with many techniques but one of the commonalities of most of them is that one must usually start by being in the Now.

Among the traditional Ways, most fall into one of two methods; concentrative or mindful. In concentrative meditation one focuses their attention on something specific, the breathing, an image, or a sound (mantra), while in mindful meditation one allows thoughts, images, feelings, sensory input, to pass through the mind without attaching to them or becoming engaged by them. In either technique one must have a starting point and that point is usually the Now.

Most of us don’t spend much time in the Now. Have you ever finished a routine trip in the car without being aware of the actual trip? You were somewhere but you weren’t in the Now. Your mind was thinking about something else while your body was on ‚Äö√Ñ√∫auto-pilot‚Äö√Ñ√π. When you are lying awake for the second night in a row, unable to sleep because your thoughts keep whirling around in your head, you’re not in the Now. When you walk away from the stove without turning off the burner, you’re dangerously not in the Now. For much of human history not being in the Now was often a fatal condition.

Babies exist in the Now and one can often watch as toddlers stop living in the Now over a matter of weeks or months. If you’ve ever played an intense game of volleyball (or some other sport) and felt like you had all the time in the world as everything around you slowed down, you were in the Now. The runner who’s in ‚Äö√Ñ√∫the zone‚Äö√Ñ√π and exhilarates in the feeling of the breath in their nostrils and the blood pumping in their arteries is in the Now.

Meditation allows us to relearn being in the Now and many of us then carry that process out of the zendo and into our daily lives. When one has learned to use that gentle, persistent redirection of the mind into the Now while meditating one often finds applications in other places. When faced with a complicated or tedious task at work, being in the Now allows us to keep focus and make better use of our time and energy. When interacting with other people, being in the Now makes us more tuned-in to them and can make us aware of subtle verbal and nonverbal cues we would otherwise miss. If one is in the Now at bedtime those whirling thoughts aren’t there and one can finally get to sleep. In a strange or unfamiliar situation being in the Now can bring to our attention details and information that can help keep us safe.

Some schools of meditation indicate that the ultimate goal of sitting is to move into a state where one is always in the Now. I would like to meet such a person. I marvel at the thought of such a disciplined mind and I think it would be fascinating to see how they deal with their day-to-day world.

Personally, this is one of the reasons that I say I ‚Äö√Ñ√∫practice‚Äö√Ñ√π meditation, staying in the Now isn’t always easy for me. I have, however, learned to notice the signs of my distraction and gently and persistently pull myself back into the moment. As time goes by I’ll continue to get better at it. It’s another tool in my spiritual and mental toolbox that helps enhance my life and make me a better person.

Namaste,
Jim

What if…?

Saturday, January 2nd, 2010

This is one of my favorite questions. What if? It can be paralyzing if we stop there, but if we take it a few steps further this little question can also be a wonderful way to open our mind and heart to new, exciting possibilities.

Sometimes when we are faced with an opportunity or a challenge we start the questioning in our mind. What if I’m not welcome? What if they don’t like me? What if I make a fool of myself?

Those are all valid questions and in many circumstances they are very real possibilities. My response when I’m working with life coaching clients is to take this scenario a bit further.

Okay, so you go to an event and you are not immediately welcomed? What then? Do you have to stand there alone or is there something you can do about it? Well of course there is something we can do about it; we can be uncomfortable and lonely, we can even leave, or we can begin to introduce ourselves to others. This can be far easier said than done, so we may role play a bit, helping the person to find an easy way to introduce themselves to that first person. Putting a smile on your face and greeting the first person will immediately allow you to feel just a bit better. What if you actually enjoy the experience? Oh wow! I know a young man who was very shy, almost painfully so. He made up his mind that he wanted to meet new people, so he put himself into situations where the only way he could talk to anyone was if it was someone new. He went places by himself. Smiled and offered his hand in greeting. This young man now loves to go places where he is a total stranger. He collects new friends like I collect shoes. What if you tried to do the same?

What if you didn’t enjoy the experience? What would happen to you then? It’s a possibility isn’t it? So, I ask you to consider that in your mind, how does it make you feel and where is the feeling located? Would it ruin your day? Does that have to be the outcome? Would you be able to learn from the experience and take it as an important life lesson? What if the lesson helped you to realize that others are possibly unsure when they attend an event? The result could be that you take it on yourself to welcome new people, which will often make you the most deeply appreciated person in the room. Hmmm, not so negative at all now, in fact it sounds pretty darned good, if that’s what you want. What if, what if, what if?

What if your dream of great wealth came true tomorrow? Sounds fabulous doesn’t it? What would happen then? Some people immediately begin to imagine the opportunities they would have to change their lives and the lives of those they care about. Other people immediately begin to worry about the taxes and the new bills they would accumulate by over spending. So, take each of these scenarios a few steps further. How would you change lives? How would that make you feel and how would you begin? Worried about all of this? What precisely are you worried about? What steps can you take to know that you would be responsible? Oh yes, that’s right! We are in charge of our own destiny here, none of these things needs to happen. Taxes and bills can easily be managed by being responsible, or engaging the assistance of someone who is honorable and trustworthy to guide us. Then what, that negative feeling or fear is greatly diminished, now we can see the possibilities of¬¨‚Ć how we can change our lives for the better.

When we ask this question I like to remember and to remind others that it’s all about moving through the immediate feeling. Instead of answering the initial what if and stopping, take it another step or two or even fifteen. Ask yourself; are any of these scenarios written in stone? Do I have the power to change them, if so how? Remembering that we have the ability to tweak and change our lives with a thought, a feeling or a smile is very empowering.

What if you allow yourself to enjoy this question? What if you allow yourself to clearly see many possibilities and then realize that there is no pre-destined outcome. What if?

Wishing you an exciting week, knowing that when you ask what if, you are asking to see alternatives and opportunities for yourself so that you can move forward in a manner which serves you best.  After all, you always deserve the best, which is what I always wish for you.

Warmly,

Sandy