The Blurt Factor

I wrote this waaaaaaaay back on February 5, 2011. It was around 7 weeks after the death of my son. I’m sharing it with you now, more than 8 years later because I think that these experiences are more common than we might imagine.

If you are someone that is grieving, it’s my hope that this will assure you that if you ‘blurt’ you are not alone. When grief is new and fresh, our brain simply does not operate in quite the same way as it does typically. Please be gentle and forgiving of yourself.

If you are supporting someone who is grieving, please be patient and aware that they are doing the best they can. Often with less grace than they would prefer, but it is their best at the moment.

February 5, 2011

I’ve been calling it the ‘blurt factor’. At times it seems so strange to me that the death of my son has not caused the planet to stop spinning. I’m sometimes puzzled that when I turn on the radio, pick up a newspaper or switch on the television that there is not wall to wall news about Mike dying. Perhaps similar to what we see and hear when there is the death of someone like Princess Diana or President Kennedy.

Mike died on December 17, 2010. I returned to work on January 3rd. I’m self-employed so that made it somewhat easier. I can and do postpone or cancel appointments when those feelings overwhelm me.

And yet, on the phone with a treasured client a few hours ago, I found myself telling her that my son had died last month and that the cause of death was suicide. Because of the nature of my business, many of my clients including this one know quite a lot about my personal life.  I use examples from my own experiences all the time to help them to move forward in a positive manner. Still, this particular client has moved to another state, she had no way of knowing this had happened and the phone call was not ‘about me’. Hence what I call The Blurt. There was no reason to share this with her, it did not benefit her in any way to know. At least not then and not in that way. Many, if not all of my clients do know because they see one another and also because I have had to cancel or postpone appointments when I’ve had a particularly emotional day. Ugh!!! This was only a moment or two of the one-hour conversation and of course, I apologized profusely. On the phone as well as in follow up communication. I don’t like that I am doing this – this blurting.

As with many of you, this is new territory for me. Part of my brain detaches often and observes with fascination the process that is unfolding. The day before my son died a client contacted me and asked if she could simply come and share for a while with me on Friday. She had lost two people that she cared about to suicide in the previous weeks. These people were unknown to one another but she was feeling overwhelmed and simply needed to share. So, we spent over 3 hours in my office. As we talked I realized that it seemed to me that survivors rarely ‘get over’ suicide. The day I spent with her and with another client who was sharing deep concerns and worries about one of his sons is the day my son died. Another fact that seems to hang around that part of my brain that is simply keeping notes and is not as emotional.

When I experience something life-changing, one of the ways I cope is to read, read, read. So, after losing Mike I began reading websites and books about grief. I was horror-stricken when I read a book that told me that I should expect to curl up in a fetal position and want to die myself. Of course, that’s not literally what the book said, but that is what I took from it at the time. Talk about selective reading! I know that is the experience of many people and I feel horrible that is so, but it’s not been my experience. At least not yet and I pray that it never will be. It sometimes feels to me that I’m not moving through this the way I’m supposed to. But I don’t know just how I am supposed to. What are the rules, the guidelines?

I remember the morning after the officers left our home telling us about the death of our son. My husband and I were sitting together, numb. I kept thinking and even saying ‘I don’t know what to do, say or think next. There must be directions somewhere.’ I think that’s what I look for when I read, directions. There isn’t a manual that I can find so I’m stumbling through doing the best that I can and I think I’m doing okay. Still, there’s the blurt.

I think what bothers me most about the blurt is that it hurts so many people and that feels unnecessary and cruel. It occurs to me that for me at least it’s the verbal equivalent to wearing mourning colors, an armband that signifies that you’ve suffered a loss or a wreath on the door indicating to all that you may be in a fragile state of some sort. While I absolutely do not consider myself fragile, I know that I am changed. Just what that change will look like down the road, I don’t know as yet, I guess I’ll find out as time goes on. For the moment that change brings the frequent blurt, the frequent memory lapses, occasional issues with focus and thankfully diminishing problems with sleep. As sleep returns, I suspect and hope that some of these other issues will dissipate to some extent as well.

I often find myself laughing and enjoying the many pleasures in my life and I am so grateful for the blessing that while I experience profound sadness I have not experienced depression. Still, the tears surprise me often, many times without warning. The last several days were incredibly rough, but today feels pretty darned good and I’m enthusiastic about teaching a class tomorrow followed by watching the Superbowl.

I suspect that blurting is sort of my way of announcing that I’ve changed in a fundamental way. People can see that I’m short, they can see that I’m aging but they can’t see that I’m emotionally wounded. Maybe that’s what the blurt is, a way of sharing and in a small way re-balancing my world. I have always shared my excitement about my family with clients when one is coming home, has something to celebrate, etc, so I suppose that in some way this is continuing to share. For some reason, it’s important for me to assure them that while Mike is gone from my physical life, he’s not gone from my heart or mind. And that I absolutely know he’s near whenever I need him.

Perhaps the blurt will diminish or even go away. Time will tell. At any rate, It’s my intention that by expressing myself here, by sharing this strange bit of behavior (at least new and strange to me) that I will be more aware and able to release the need. Again, time will tell.

Namaste,
Sandy

 

Who are You Now? How do You Identify Yourself?

A few days ago I was thinking about how we introduce ourselves to others. I began thinking about some identifying aspects of myself.

– Amateur Gardener
– Bacon Lover
– Short Woman

Now here’s the thing, each of these things is true. They are facets of me, but they are not the primary way that I identify myself. In my own head or when I’m speaking with others.

When one is experiencing grief, it’s not only common but quite reasonable that at least in the beginning, that feeling, what they feel they have lost becomes their primary focus. Depending on how deep the wound, it may be the only thing they are able to think about, talk about or feel for a time. That’s natural and normal.

Having said that, I want to acknowledge that we are not our wound. Regardless of how painful the loss of my son, I was always Sandy. Some of the aspects of my being had certainly changed, but there were so very many that remained. I was still a wife, a mom, daughter, friend, etc.

Human beings are marvelously multi-faceted being. This is not about ignoring the wound that brings on grief or denying that it is a part of you – not all of you. It is about trusting that in time, with safe, healthy grief work, you will once again shift from identifying yourself with as your wound to a person that has been wounded and is healing.

I am not Suicide Loss, I am Sandy.  That’s what you will always read on my name tag. How are you identifying yourself?

Namaste,
Sandy

Self-Care, Yes, it Matters

If we’ve worked together for anything, you’ve heard me suggest… encourage… alright, I nag about self-care! Because it matters so very much. Self-care is right at the top of the list as far as I’m concerned.

Why? Because if you are not taking good care of you, you cannot possibly take care of anyone or anything else.

What does self-care mean? It means something different to all of us and it’s quite likely that it may mean something different this evening than it does at this moment. Put as simply as possible, it’s giving yourself permission to do what you need most at this moment.

For example, a cup of coffee and a stroll around the yard in the very wee hours of the morning is excellent self-care for me. The coffee feels warm in my hands even while the morning dew refreshes my feet. Taking a peek at plants as they are opening up, some showing off brand new blooms put me in a very excited and at the same time very tranquil frame of mind. It’s good for me.

Later, I pretty much need a walk. On nice days, I may need a couple. Walking, stretching my legs calms me and reminds me that I am strong and capable.

As the day winds down, I almost always feel a strong longing to spend time in the bathtub. It may be 10 minutes or an hour. Here’s the thing, it truly is a very intense feeling, my body and body are telling me to carve out time to spend in the water. I always feel like my very soul craves being near water and whenever possible, in the water.

Other days, self-care means checking off boxes that are on my list. Maybe cutting the grass or cleaning the house. Please, please, please let it be cutting the grass and not cleaning the house! 🙂

It might be realizing that concerns or worry are money related. The act of acknowledging and understanding what is prompting this feeling helps to find a solution. Perhaps cutting an expense or picking up a few extra hours at work. Also, excellent self-care if the feeling within you is good.

The very process of discernment, what is mine and what can/should I delegate? Making those decisions are excellent self-care as this brings around a calm which relieves stress.

It’s absolutely, completely, entirely alright to ask for support! We can’t do everything for everyone all of the time. It’s a gift to others as well as ourselves to ask for and allow support and caring. To share a hug, a meal or a conversation.

Self-care is about treating yourself with at least as much kindness, compassion and courtesy as you would a stranger.

Notice what your body is telling you, is it being nurtured with healthy food in the right proportions? Hear what your heart is saying to you. Are your thoughts and feeling being expressed in safe and healthy ways?

Excellent self-care is not any one thing. It is many small things. It’s making yourself a priority. After all, there’s only one like you. I know this to be true because I heard it from Mr. Rogers.

“Taking care is one way to show your love. Another way is letting people take good care of you when you need it.”
― Fred Rogers

Namaste,
Sandy

Group Coaching

Have you ever heard the expression “There is a great strength in numbers”? It’s true!

Here are a few benefits to group coaching:

  • As your coach, I will always help you to hold the focus on the goals which are important to you.
  • You will find support and motivation from others as you connect with others in your group.
  • You will learn, grow and be inspired as you share stories and wisdom with one another.
  • You will benefit from accountability and watch your ‘to-do’ items move to the ‘done’ column.
  • Group celebration! You celebrate your success with the people who truly care about you.
  • You grow and move forward with a professional coach at a very affordable fee.

Weekly, Thursday mornings, 7–9 am
$100 per month, that’s only $25 per coaching session!

The adventure begins Thursday, November 3rd  –  Register Now!

To register, visit the website: http://www.sandywalden.com/coaching/business-coaching.php

This group is forming now, space will be limited so if you are ready to begin living the life you know you desire, register today.

Namaste,
Sandy

 

 

 

ADD, ADHD – Hypnosis can Help

When I talk with someone who has ADD or ADHD I am always astounded by the amazing energy, usually accompanied by incredible creativity. Sometimes these people are diagnosed as ADD or ADHD, other times they simply assume that is what they would be diagnosed with if they went to a doctor, perhaps they’ve read books and done the quizzes or have come to this conclusion in one way or another.

It seems that a common theme they share is the fear that medication which will help them to focus and concentrate could also take away or at least dull their creative talent, dull their appetite or even stifle or dull their personality. Let me tell you, that would get my attention too! These people want to retain all of the sparkle and fabulous-ness that makes them who they are, as an admirer, that’s what I want for them as well.

To my way of thinking, it seems completely unreasonable for people to have to choose between having that creative spark and being able to focus well enough on the day to day tasks to move through their day with relative ease. They shouldn’t have to choose losing their appetite and enjoyment of delicious food in order to be able to function easily and effectively. In short, I don’t think it’s reasonable to ask people to give up valuable bits of what makes them magnificent in order to allow them to cope with ADD, ADHD or simply a lack of focus and concentration.

Hypnosis to the rescue! Hmmm…maybe that sounds a bit dramatic. Let me explain a bit here. Research shows that hypnosis is a very effective way to treat both ADD and ADHD. When you choose to deal with these issues via hypnosis you can release the fear that you will lose your appetite or your special sparkle that makes your personality so unique and wonderful. Your hypnotist will work with you to address your specific needs and desires. When you work with a hypnotist it is her job to work with your unique circumstances, this really is a very personal service.

Going into hypnotic trance is something that you do easily and every day. It is a completely natural state. Your hypnotist will ask you questions to ascertain what sort of induction to use to ease you into a hypnotic trance. While you are in trance, a state which is often referred to as hypnotic sleep, your subconscious mind is open to suggestions which will support you in making the changes that you desire.  Be assured that despite the message that is often given in television programs or movies, you will not do anything while you are in a hypnotic trance that is against your will or nature. In other words, you are not going to get up in front of strangers and perform Frank Sinatra songs…unless you want to. 😉

While in hypnotic trance you are in control. That bears repeating, you are in control at all times while in hypnosis. You, the hypnotic subject calls the shots, not the hypnotist.

Children and teens are incredibly good hypnotic subjects, and they are often the ones who struggle most with the issues of focus and concentration If your young child or teen is struggling with focus and concentration or has been diagnosed with ADD or ADHD, you may want to consider hypnosis as a very viable alternative for your loved one.

I’ve found that hypnosis is of course incredibly helpful for adults as well. One client who comes to mind initially sought me out because she found that it was difficult for her to stay on task effectively enough to follow up with clients. This was a problem. The results that she achieved were very good and she supports these results by listening to a hypnosis recording which I created just for her. As a result, her business is growing; her ability to discern what needs immediate attention and what can wait is growing. Her creativity has not been stifled one bit, in fact, she has shared that the increased ability to focus and concentrate effectively has enhanced her creativity. She is now able to enjoy the creative outlets which nourish her soul in a way which had previously escaped her.

Is hypnosis for you? I don’t know, but you do. If you or someone you care about struggles with ADD, ADHD or has difficulty maintaining the focus and concentration then hypnosis may be just the ticket. Let’s talk.

Namaste,
Sandy

 

Better Study Habits – Hypnosis

How can hypnosis help you?

Recently I’ve had more and more people coming to me because they wanted to improve their concentration and focus. Of course these issues can be addressed with hypnosis! In fact hypnosis is very effective for children, adolescents and adults alike. The only thing that is required is a healthy mind and a willingness to make a change.

Who might benefit from this? Here are a few examples that I’ve worked with most recently.

A woman who wanted to grow her business. This particular woman works from home and tells me that in the past she was easily distracted from her business by all of the distractions that are part of being at home. Kids, husband, meal planning, etc.  As always, before I hypnotized her it was important for me to know what was happening for her and what goals she desired. Then came the hypnosis. This client reports that focus and concentration are coming easier and easier to her.

Another client contacted me for assistance with a professional exam. This exam was critical to her professional growth and she was extremely nervous that come the day of the exam she would freeze, being unable to focus or concentrate.  This nervousness was also causing her focus and concentration to be sporadic and lacking as she prepared for this exam. I spoke with this client after her exam. Her happy update is that she was calm throughout the two day exam, concentration came easily and she feels very positive about the outcome.

An enhanced ability to concentrate and focus can most certainly be achieved through hypnosis.

Be assured, when you are hypnotized you are not sleeping at all. Quite the reverse. Hypnosis is a heightened state of awareness and focus. Your hypnotist will guide or facilitate you into a trance state; however this can only happen if you are open to the experience. Because of this, all hypnosis is in fact self-hypnosis. This relaxed and focused state may not feel much different than the awareness you experience during other relaxed or very focused experiences. Perfect!

Hypnosis works because the hypnotist is speaking to your subconscious mind. Your subconscious mind is what is operating most of your experience at any time. After all, when was the last time you focused and deliberately reminded your liver to filter impurities from your system? My guess is that you leave that task to your subconscious, and for good reason. Your subconscious has the job well under control.

You have the ability to accept or reject suggestions that are given to you. Your hypnotist simply does not have the ability to make you do anything that is against your will. That only happens in the movies. In short, you are in control at all times.

You decide to make positive changes and to accept the suggestions that your hypnotist offers to you, your subconscious listens and acts on your preferences. This allows you to more easily release fears, phobias and unnecessary pain. It also allows you to shift to your preferred weight, stop smoking and as we discussed above, improve study habits through better concentration and clearer focus. All of these issues, and so many more can successfully be addressed with hypnosis.

It’s all up to you. When you change the way your mind thinks, you change the way your life unfolds. When you are ready to make a positive change, contact me.

Namaste,
Sandy

 

 

 

 

Reduce Stress With Hypnosis

Are you stressed? Perhaps it would make more sense to ask, do you know anyone who isn’t stressed? Sadly, more and more people experience unhealthy stress.

There are excellent options for dealing with everyday stress.  Exercise immediately comes to mind. Meditation and Reiki, of course, are other powerful methods to calm the mind and allow the body to relax at the same time. Both are incredibly effective and as you well know, I’m a huge fan.

Reiki has changed my life and I’m incredibly grateful. Likewise, regular meditation has made some changes that I did not expect, but which I’m very grateful to now be experiencing. However, there are of course other alternatives.

Almost everyone who comes to me to experience hypnosis brings up stress in their lives.  Work stress, stress from school and of course this time of year many people experience incredible stress from dealing with the holidays. Hypnosis can and does help.

While in the hypnotic trance, you sub-conscious and your hypnotist have a little chat. Your conscious mind may be fully aware of the conversation or it may be relaxing to the extent that it has simply handed things over to the subconscious for a while. Be assured, that everything your hypnotist says to you, you will be able to remember if that is what you choose. While experiencing hypnosis, you will not go to sleep. The hypnotic trance is instead a state of heightened focus. So, rather than sleeping you are more aware of what your hypnotist is saying to you than at any time. This intense focus on the hypnotist and the suggestions that you are being given is why hypnosis is so effective.

While experiencing hypnosis your hypnotist will give you suggestions. Rest assured these suggestions will work for you only if they resonate with you. For instance, I am absolutely not interested in becoming a lion-tamer. Nope, not me, not for any reason. In fact, I’m opposed to the entire practice for ethical reasons. Because I am so adamantly opposed, believing that the practice is cruel and unethical, my hypnotist would never be able to successfully give me a suggestion to be a lion-tamer.

However, I am not at all opposed to taking a nice walk with my canine companion, Indy. So, if my hypnotist were to give me a suggestion to take a 30-minute walk with my buddy every day, knowing that that activity is enhancing my physical health and allowing me to release stress at the same time, then by golly, that’s just what I would do.

The suggestions would be more detailed and full than that representation, but it’s important to note how very effective they are. If the person being hypnotized wants the suggestions to be effective. The power, the control is always, always, always with the person being hypnotized, never with the hypnotist.

So, can you reduce your stress with hypnotism? Yes, you can and I highly recommend doing so if you are not having success managing stress on your own. Hypnotism can help you.

This week, I wish you a stress-free seven days of peace, calm and holiday joy. And if you’re feeling stressed, just give me a jingle and we can talk.

Namaste,
Sandy

Hypnotism – It’s Not Like in the Movies

When I used to think about hypnosis or hypnotism, I had lots of ideas from old movies, many of them great fun, most of them a bit scary. It turns out that none of them were accurate. That’s really good news!

The better news is how very useful hypnotism is for anyone who chooses to participate. And I do mean participate. I can’t hypnotize you if you choose not to be hypnotized. You can only imagine what a relief that is to my husband and grown sons.

Recently a man came into my office to relieve a bit of wound up nerves. In short, he wanted to become more calm and relaxed. His greatest fear was that he while he was under, he would tell me very personal, even embarrassing details about his life. Wasn’t going to happen. I began by assuring him that he would hear everything that I would say to him, and I mean everything. No secrets here.

Second of all, I assured him that because he was so concerned about answering questions with embarrassing details I simply would not ask him to speak at all while he was in the hypnotic trance. This is not always the case. Sometimes while a client is in the hypnotic trance I will ask a question or even several questions. That would have only escalated this gentleman’s fear and ramped up his nerves. So, I assured him that his hypnosis session would only consist of my talking to him, his only job while experiencing hypnosis was to focus on my words. Easy enough. He was also incredibly reassured to find that if I  had asked questions, he would not have answered them if he preferred not to. You do not lose control when you experience hypnosis. You still have choices and you will make the choices that are right for you.

It’s important to me for all of my clients to know what to expect when they experience hypnosis. We chat and I do my best to answer any questions that they can come up with and probably a few that they hadn’t thought of yet as well.

Be assured that you will not spill the beans to me while under hypnosis unless that is truly your preference. You are entirely and completely capable of lying if that’s what you want to do. You are in control. This is not the Twilight Zone or The Outer Limits.

Hypnosis is about allowing you to make the changes you choose to make in your life. Only you have that control, not me. As a recovering control freak, I find it very reassuring that I still retain control, even while under hypnosis. Whew, that’s a huge relief!

Please rest assured that if you come to me to change your life, but you really don’t want to change. You will get the result you truly desire. Your brain is a wonderful and powerful tool. Your conscious mind may think one thing, but it’s your sub-conscious that calls most of the shots. That’s why we chat and chat and chat some more. It’s important for me to understand what you really want to occur in your life. That way while you are under hypnosis or in the hypnotic trance I am able to offer you suggestions that will be effective.

It’s all up to you. You make the decisions. Your first really good decision is to investigate hypnosis. What can hypnotism offer you? Ask questions about a hypnotic sleep or hypnotic trance. Ask and ask and ask, until you are totally comfortable. After all, this isn’t a movie, it’s your life and you are writing the script.

Hypnotism, it’s not at all like I imagined when I watched the movies. Instead, I find that hypnotism is much more exciting. Being hypnotized allows me to improve my life and that of my clients. That’s what hypnosis would look like in the movies if I were making the movies.

Namaste,
Sandy

We Live What We Believe

Somewhere around the age of three or 4, people as a whole are pretty amazing. I am privileged to know a man who recognizes and appreciates just how amazing his 3 or 4-year-old son is, day in and day out.

I see this gentleman every week and I’m always impressed with how his eyes literally light up when he speaks about his wife or his 2 children. His daughter is just a baby so she delights him just by cooing and breathing.  His son, on the other hand, is an entirely different kettle of fish. This man regularly shares the wisdom and the absolute joy that he receives from just playing with his little guy.

Apparently one of their favorite things to do is to play ball. Positioning themselves on their long drive, the little boy would hit the plastic ball, aiming at the tree waaaaaaaay down at the end of the drive. Dad would smile and cheer him on.

Recently all of this changed. A few weeks ago, we experienced some windy days. I don’t mean Dorothy and Toto flying off to Oz sort of windy, but pretty hefty winds just the same.  You guessed it; this man and his little boy were out playing ball. The wind was at the little boy’s back so when he hit the ball the first time and it whacked the tree at the end of the drive the man wasn’t the least bit surprised. Still, he cheered his son, encouraging him to do it again and again. Which of course, the little boy accomplished easily.

Fast forward to their next playtime. The man and the boy, outside playing ball, normal weather. Still, the little boy expects to hit the tree at the end of the drive just like he did last time. And he does. Again and again. Naturally, the man continues to whoop it up, so excited for his son that he is continuously hitting his goal, the tree.

About a week or so later, it occurred to the man one day. That freaky wind that carried the ball so easily was no longer blowing. Still, his incredible little boy was regularly hitting the tree at the end of the drive. This is even more exciting! The man, however, is more clever than many might be in the situation, and he doesn’t tell his son that it was the wind that made that amazing hit possible in the first place, he simply keeps encouraging success and celebrating every hit.

No one told the little boy he could only hit the tree with the wind behind his back. So, for him, it was the simple truth that he could hit the tree. He proved it to himself and simply continued living that truth.

In 1954, Roger Bannister was the first man to prove an old truism wrong. It was believed that the human body could not run a mile in 4 minutes or less. That truism had been proven again and again since we began recording such events. But on that special day, Mr. Bannister broke the old record and made a new truism, of course, the 4-minute mile could be run and several other men accomplished the same feat in that year.

All of this matters because as human beings we are always programming ourselves. We read newspapers and yes, sometimes even books. We listen to television and radio; we speak with family, friends, and co-workers. Learning what we can and cannot do.

This is one of the reasons why life coaching and hypnotism are so very powerful. We spend part of each and every session talking about the way you talk to yourself. What words are coming out of your mouth? What ‘truth’ are you telling? We believe what we hear frequently, otherwise, TV ads wouldn’t sell us on the belief that one toothpaste is vastly superior to the other brands on the shelf. How many of us have researched our toothpaste? Not me, still I believe that one is better for my little pearlies and so I buy it regularly, even keeping back up tubes available, because I have come to believe what I have heard.

We all do it, it is human nature. This is very cool because it means that we can teach or program ourselves any way that we choose. We’re doing it anyhow, so why not do it with deliberation?

I strongly encourage my life coaching clients to speak kindly to themselves, to be deliberate in framing their words and phrases. Because it matters what they say. Not only do others hear and come to believe what words they utter, but they hear and believe as well. Repetition does that for us.

Same goes when a client is experiencing hypnotism. We share a long, interesting conversation before the actual hypnotizing happens. At least I find it interesting. I want to learn as much about the clients’ true beliefs and desires as possible. Why? Because when they are experiencing a hypnotic trance, I’m going to offer suggestions to change the clients’ life in one manner or another. If these suggestions are accepted by the client, they will become their new truth. If you’ve ever listened to a hypnotist, you will have noticed that these new truths are repeated over and over in ways that the client prefers.

For example, if I were hypnotizing myself (and I do) to release unnecessary concerns about something I would tell myself something along these lines. ‘I release concerns regarding…as I trust that all is working out as it should.’ ‘I feel more calm, more at ease regarding…feeling better and better.’ In no way would I be lying to myself, that would be totally unacceptable, I would simply be introducing a new truth. Easing into feeling better, more calm, releasing concern that is not needed. That would form my new belief and I get to relax because after all, we do live what we believe.

One of my favorite people in the world frequently tells me that I frustrate her. She tells me that everything always works out for me and that my life is just silly easy, especially compared to hers. It makes me smile, which pushes her buttons, makes me smile more…you can see where this is going I’m sure. I’ve always shared my belief that life works out well if you expect it to do so. Just that simple. And it turns out that so far my life has worked out beautifully, and I expect that it will continue that way.

That doesn’t mean I haven’t had bruises and bumps, just like she has. The difference is that she believes the bruises and bumps will be hard, painful and difficult. Guess what? She finds the normal ups and downs of life to frequently be hard, painful and difficult.  I too have experienced pain and would not be surprised if life tosses a bit more my way from time to time. The man difference is that I absolutely, firmly believe that the pain will be lessened as time goes on and that I will learn from it, coming out a stronger and for me, this is the key, a happier person. That’s my belief and for my life up to this point, it’s always worked out just that way.

What do you believe about your life? How can you change up your belief just a little bit to make today better? Are you willing to see yourself hitting the tree at the end of your drive? I bet you can.

I encourage you to believe that you deserve success in whatever way you define success. This week I encourage you to believe that you deserve to be happy. This week I ask you to know that you live what you believe. Because my friend, you do.

Namaste,
Sandy

Energy and the Penny Wall

What you are looking at – if you are looking at the picture here, is a Penny Wall. Well, that’s what I’m calling it anyway.

A few days ago my friend and fellow Serenity Community member, Andrea Lange asked me if I had ever stuck a penny to the wall using only my energy. While I’ve had some interesting experiences in my life I had to admit that up until then I had never thought of sticking pennies to the wall. Have you?

So, I asked her what we were using to adhere these pennies, some shiny, some dull to this wall in the hall between our offices. Her response shouldn’t have surprised me, but it did. Energy and Intention. Do you dig that or what!?

Okay, I thought I would give it a try. Picking up a penny, I pressed it against the wall as hard as I could. As soon as I removed my finger the apparently un-energized penny fell to the floor with a quiet but very distinct thud. Oh. Maybe there’s more to this than I had considered. Andrea only chuckled a little bit; she’s a very kind and gentle woman. We chatted a bit more. Andrea’s instructions were simple, she asked me to intend that the penny easily sticks to the wall. See, feel and believe that my energy was flowing through me, through the penny and into the wall. Know it would stay there if that was my intention.

On the second try, my penny stuck. I was so excited I’m sure many of you heard me shout and perhaps felt the earth shake a bit as I jumped up and down in absolute glee. To say I was absolutely delighted by the energetic penny would be something of an understatement. Andrea stuck her penny to the wall and we both went home.

The next day our pennies were still stuck to the wall. Oh, this was getting even better! So, as I saw clients during the day, I invited them to stick their pennies to the wall. Following the instructions Andrea had shared I encouraged them to use their energy, their intention to feel, see and know the pennies would adhere, easily and totally effortlessly. I should have been taking pictures of the looks in the eyes as one person after another easily placed their penny on the wall.

All of this has a point you know. It’s a visual example of what we can and do accomplish each and every day with our intentions, using our energy. We move through life, thinking one thing and another. Having expectations that are positive or perhaps less than happy. Each of these thoughts, intentions, worries, fears, and expectations has an effect on our lives. The Penny Wall makes that pretty clear.

I think I’m going to take some fabulous colored pencils into the office and ask clients to sign and date their pennies as they put them on the wall. Just a little reminder that our energy, our thoughts, our intentions create our world.

I’m not speaking specifically about life coaching, Reiki, meditation or any other form of energy work today. In fact, I’m talking about all of these things and more. I encourage you to simply take a moment to think about how you would like your life to unfold today. What would make you happy? Allow your thoughts and feelings to flow easily, what feels good to you? Take one more look at the Penny Wall. When I tried to attach my penny using force it fell to the floor. When I gently held it to the wall and asked for it to stay, it did.

No nagging here. The coach is going for another cup of coffee and an apple. I just wanted to share my energy and intention with you. I intend to have a fabulous day; perhaps I’ll put another penny on the wall. If you would like to add yours, come on by. There is plenty for everyone.

Namaste,
Sandy